Flashed before my eyes- June 25, 2012
I’m no ophthalmologist, just an attention seeker with a laptop. But, I’m here today to dispel the rumor that pink eye is caused by getting poop in your eye. This topic came up because I just battled another bout of Oozy Eyeball Disease, better known as Bacterial Conjunctivitis.
The guys in Knocked Up claimed they “farted bare-assed on each other’s pillows” and gave each other pink eye with “poop particles”. This was an exaggeration for comedy, not based on medical knowledge.
My doctor said lots of different bacteria cause pink eye, not just bacteria from fecal matter. I was concerned when someone told me I was getting pink eye because I change my baby’s diaper and then touch my face. Eww! I wash my hands, you sicko!
Right after my coworkers sent me home to wash out my eyes last week, I really did have a reason to wash out my eyes.
I left a meeting and went to my car in a parking deck downtown. I was climbing the stairs when I turned the corner and saw a man leaning on the railing with it all out. I mean IT all out. Yep, a homeless guy using our city’s public parking deck as his private restroom flashed me! I turned and bolted towards security. I didn’t bother to call the police. I had to get to the doctor. I begged him to give me Listerine, Isopropyl Alcohol or anything to disinfect my eyes and brain from that sight.
I did notice the guy’s eyes before I laid eyes on his junk. Neither appeared infected. But again I’m no ophthalmologist, nor urologist.
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