Dear Charlotte,

When someone asks how old you are, you proudly announce, “I’m two!”  This is usually accompanied by you holding up your thumb and pointer finger instead of your pointer and middle finger.  I hear Europeans start finger counts with the thumb, and thus you show two on your hands like an English or French child.  Daddy and are proud of your worldliness with this display.  Way to go kiddo!  Excuse me, Manière d’aller kiddo !

Today you are officially 2-and-a-half.  I don’t know if I want to tell you that for fear that you will stop shouting “I’m two!” These last six months of having you as a two-year-old has been wonderful!  Two has brought discovery.  You have discovered what you like and what you strongly dislike.  You notice everything now!  Everyday you learn something new or ask another question.  Just the other day in the car we talked about the traffic lights and how they turn green and red.  You shout, “Schoo Bus!” whenever you see one.

You adore your friends and talk about them all the time.  You name every kid in your class and talk about them with affection.  Today you even hugged each one before we left.  They all shout “Bye Chalette!” When you leave.  Two-year-old’s love to shout I’ve learned.  With this adoration of your peers comes fierce competitiveness.  You are not one to be pushed around by other toddlers and will vehemently defend yourself with a returned shove.  Sharing and being nice are things you and your friends work on daily.

You still love Sesame Street but your interests have expanded.  Any book or toy with Mickey Mouse is a favorite because of the hit TV preschool show “Mickey Mouse Clubhouse.”  If Daddy and I are being honest, it makes us want to drive nails through our skulls, but you love it.  Being an ever growing girly-girl you have discovered princesses and adore any book or movie with a princess.  I am weary of too much princess because of the messages that can send little girls, but I like the newer princesses in today’s movies.  Besides, your favorite princess is now my favorite too.  You love Rapunzel from “Tangled.” I mean, LOVE her!   You talk about how brave and kind Rapunzel is all the time.  I like the “Tangled” story and I’m okay with your fanaticism.  I try not to get tired of singing the song from the movie in the car over and over to you.  I know it won’t be long until you ask for some other song and I’ll miss the “Rapunzel song.”

You love your baby dolls, blocks, books, balls, kitchen set, trains, dress-up clothes and games.  You are on the move all the time.  Sometimes we can’t keep up.  You have improved identifying your colors and shapes.  I can tell your fine motor skills are getting better and better when you color and play blocks.  You are more adventurous with your food, trying new things that Daddy and I like to eat.  We’re proud of how many fruits and vegetables you love.  Sometimes we just have to tell you that “Rapunzel likes green beans” to get you to eat something.  It makes Daddy and I laugh.

The potty is still a daily learning experience, but I have a feeling you will turn the corner soon.  Especially as it gets closer to when the new baby will be born.

In the morning I ask you what you dreamed about.  It’s  always the same answer, “I dweamed about my baby sister!  She took a nap wiff me!”  That’s when my heart melts and I want to bottle you up at 2-and-a-half forever.

I love you, my darling, darling girl.

Love,

Mama

Hold her a little longer.

Rock her a little more.

Tell her another story.

(You’ve only told her four.)

Let her sleep on your shoulder.

Rejoice in her happy smile.

She’s only two-and-a-half

for such a little while. 

-Author Unknown

Sometimes it can be a little irritating as a parent to simply be known as “mom” or “dad.”  You do lose a bit of your identity in parenthood.  There is no denying that, especially at daycare or preschool.  My daughter’s classmates know me as “Charlotte’s Mommy.”  It’s cool, though.  I understand.  There are lots of mommies and daddies rushing in and out of that place.

I definitely know the names of Charlotte’s friends’ parents and use them.  When Charlotte is speaking with them, we at least try to use their first names.  “Ms. Jane” or “Mr. Bill” seem to be acceptable for most of them.  Besides, I’ve learned two-year-olds are not great at understanding the concept, let alone pronouncing surnames.

Sometimes I just end up being “Charlotte’s Mom” and I can live with that.  It’s not a huge deal.

Today, some parents made it a huge deal.  The school keeps a basket of crackers at the front desk for the children to snack on and whine about when leaving.  The mother of a child in the class behind Charlotte was holding the basket down for her child and Charlotte walked up.  The father was standing beside them.  She held the basket out to Charlotte.

Me to Charlotte: “Can you say ‘thank you’ to Sally’s Mommy?”

Charlotte said “thank you” and the parents sort of scoffed at me.  Then I couldn’t make up what happened next if I tried.

www.etonline.com

The dad started singing the Cheers theme song.  Yes, Cheers, as in Sam, Diane, Norm and Cliff.  Cheers.  He broke out into song with, “Sometimes you want to go where everybody knows your name.”  The way they looked at me I assumed it was because I didn’t use their names.  Why else would this  guy sing this?  Are you kidding me?!  Your kid isn’t even in my kid’s class!  I think it’s pretty impressive that I know your child’s name, let alone yours.  I ushered Charlotte out the door, quickly.

Sir, I suppose you think you’re a clever cool hipster who’s able to recall 1980’s television show references at a moment’s notice.  But, please know EVERYONE knows that song and you’re not that clever.

I can’t decide what I’ll call them the next time I see them.  But, let me be clear when I say if he EVER irreverently references the phenomenal television legacy that is Cheers, I will go off!  Let’s face it.  “Making your way in the world today takes everything you got.”

If you have read my blog for some time, you know that I went…um…crazy…when I went past my due date and was still pregnant. I was 41 weeks along when I was induced. Now that I’m two years removed from my hormonal haze, I realize how unbelievably blessed I was to be pregnant that long. Charlotte came out round, screaming, and squishy like all babies should. Full-term.

November 2, 2010. The day I became a mama.

Since I started working with the March of Dimes as a member of their Board of Directors Eastern North Carolina Division I have learned so much about their mission to improve the health of babies by preventing birth defects, premature birth, and infant mortality. Of the 16,000 babies born too soon each year in my home state, North Carolina, half of the cases happen for unknown reasons. That means it could have been me. My water could have broken early and I could have delivered my baby too soon even with proper prenatal care. Doctors are still searching for answers as to why healthy women go into labor too soon. Check out more stats here.

I’m sure you all know someone who was, or has had a preemie. My dear friend Nicole did everything right. She got all the proper care. It happened to her. She has two little 2 1/2 year-old angels named Avery and Raegan.  Their picture is above. When I say these kids are miracles, I mean they are miracles. The twins were born at about 25 weeks and had extensive stays in the NICU. Avery has endured multiple surgeries to put a stint in his brain. He now has hearing aids and a special wheelchair. He is a little fighter and doctors continue to be amazed at his progress! Raegan is Little Miss Personality and it’s a joy to see her run around with Charlotte.

Nicole and Avery on Halloween

Nicole’s husband, Keith and Raegan

Saturday is World Prematurity Day. The March of Dimes is working to get enough signatures to light the White House purple for one night for prematurity awareness. That’s where you come in, readers! Get pumped! Please sign the petition. Sign it for Avery. Sign it for Raegan. Sign it for any preemie you’ve ever known. Sign it for the full-term, fat 10-pounders you know. Sign it with thanksgiving for your healthy children. Sign it with the hope that all babies will be born strong and healthy. Sign it and then tell me who you’re signing it for in the comments below. It’s super easy, I promise!  Here’s the link.  Let’s light the White House purple!

We got Charlotte all excited for a birthday party Saturday morning. I explained how the toy truck was not for her as I put it in the gift bag. (I only wrap at Christmas. Don’t judge.) Greyson was all like, “Who’s party is this again?”

I explained it was for Harrison. He is the darling, toe-headed 3-year-old of my dear friend Beth Anne. She is my sorority sister and Internet maven. I was all like, “You know, Beth Anne. Her husband went to school with us too.” He said, “Oh, are they cool?” I was all like, “Um, yeah. I told you she is one of my sisters. We were the best chapter on campus, so yeah. I’d say they’re cool.” He reminded me that I am a 31 year-old mother and really need to let the sorority days go. (Never!)

I dolled up Charlotte in a little fall frock and off we went. We were about 20 minutes late. I figure it was cool to be fashionably late to a party. I was all like, “Charlotte, can you say ‘Happy Birthday Harry!’?” She giggled.

I rang the bell and Beth Anne stared at me like I had five heads. She was all like, this.

Beth Anne and I doubled over in giggles at my stupidity. The party is next Saturday. Greyson was all like, “Seriously, Amy?” My mistake meant I got to hug my friend and get a sneak peek of her new house.

Charlotte was all like, “I want cake!” I was all like, “Yeah, too bad. We’re gonna go get flu shots and vote early.”

In the car Greyson was all like, “She’s cool. I like her.” I was all like, “I told you.”

No surprise. I got the date at our Early Voting precinct wrong too. Guess when it opens? Yep. Next Saturday.

The family flu shots were somewhat successful. I was all like, “I want to try the new type of flu shot with the 90% smaller needle that hurts less! Oh! It’s covered by our insurance!” Greyson and I got the new shot and Charlotte got the standard pediatric dose. We tried to be brave in front of our toddler but both of us were all like, “Ugh! Hurts less, my ass!” Our arms are still red two days later.

About as red as Greyson’s face standing on Beth Anne’s steps.

We hyped up this weekend a ton.  We promised all these fabulous features we really weren’t positive were even at this farm we were going to.  Everyday we would say, “Charlotte, do you want to go to a farm?!  Won’t that be so fun!?”  She’s in this phase where she agrees with pretty much everything we say.  I could have said, “Do you want to drink tuna juice?!” and she would have been psyched.

It was her good buddy Adalyn’s 2nd birthday party.  This place has all the autumn goodness a kid could hope for and a parent could photograph.

We were those a-hole parents that totally got there late.  It was entirely my fault. It’s about a 45 minute drive to get to the farm and I thought we could get there late and it wouldn’t be a problem.  Wrong!  They were waiting for us to start the hayride as we hurried to the entrance.  Greyson and I were mid-argument about the diaper bag as we rushed and dropped things.  I guiltily greeted the birthday girl’s parents and off we went.

For 99% of the party, it was wonderful!  Charlotte and Adalyn call each other Chasie and Addie.  They are truly adorable together.  They are the only girls in their class at school and quite the pair.  Adalyn didn’t like it when Charlotte got too close to her cake and Charlotte seriously envied Adalyn’s presents.  Ah, girlfriends!  It starts early, doesn’t it?

They climbed on the picnic table and dug in the cooler.  We joked with her parents that we should just give them some frozen water instead of taking them on train rides and playground equipment.

Oh, I said 99% didn’t I?  Yeah.  The last 15 minutes were a screaming, thrashing blur of pumpkins and hay.  When I say my child hit the proverbial wall, I mean she lost it.  Completely lost it.  This was the type of tantrum that started with pumpkin selection and ended with a string of snot several inches long, dangling from her pacifier.  Yes, we gave our kid a paci in front of all the other parents who’ve binky-weaned their toddlers.  We had no choice really.  Everyone was staring at her while she screamed like we had shoved bamboo shoots under her fingernails.  I swear we only tried to help her carry a pumpkin too heavy for her to pick up!  But, that was all it took.  It was terrible.  There was nothing we could do to calm her down.  We quickly said goodbye after climbing off the hayride, Greyson fireman carried her out while I juggled a pumpkin with a light coating of snot.

This was just after I had wiped her paci clean. The daddies are doing what they can in the wake of Charlotte’s tantrum here.

Charlotte was asleep before we got out of the parking lot.  We then had a 45 minute husband/wife discussion on the way home about whether we should seek a child and family therapist to find out what is wrong with our kid.

We figured it out.  She suffers from Naplesstoddleritis.  She was an absolute delight the rest of the weekend.  We agreed as a couple that tantrums would not rule our lives.  We can’t get so upset when she does.  We have to remain calm and realize she’s a 22 month-old who’s exhausted and can’t express herself yet.  That’s okay.  This will pass.  We plan on not reacting so dramatically.  She reacts to us being upset.  We just need to calmly remove her for a time-out.  Notice that’s what Adalyn’s dad was doing in the last picture.

I wrote about this a few weeks ago and many of you had some great ideas for us.  Thank you.  Please let us know if there is something else you think we should have done in this instance.  She was just tired and got mad when we took the pumpkin from her hands.  Thoughts?